Note: Saying “fuck you” to someone you love is the worst possible thing to do in any situation.
Nothing could hurt more.
It is particularly bad when said to your mother on Christmas Eve in the church parking lot before Midnight Mass!
Well, if it is any consolation, I must admit such words have been known to escape my lips in regard to family members from time to time…
Some consolation perhaps if you are NOT the mother!
On Christmas Eve, he actually told you to “shut the fuck up.”
It’s all relative. When someone you love or someone who loves you says it…the intent of causing deep hurt is there. My mom used to say it to me when I was a kid if made mistakes like not rinsing all the soap off the dishes or dropping something that would break …so I guess I’ve been somewhat desensitized. My husband freely says it to me a few times a week…he is trying to hurt me, but he’s the jerk not me. I refuse to allow “fuck you” to harm me anymore. The paradox is that I reserve saying “fuck you” to times when I really mean it…I don’t bother saying it to my husband – I don’t think it matters to him in the slightest.
Mama, see, aside from me, my family says things like “fuck you” as easily as “hello.” It’s not something I say unless I actually mean it. I feel awful because when I said it to that person, in that exact moment, I really meant it. They hurt me and I reacted. I’d never wanted to intentionally hurt that person before, and I never want to do it again.
Yes I see…you did something that made you feel terrible and you learned from it. You never want to do it again. So it’s time to forgive yourself and move on. “To err is human, to forgive divine.” I hope you are moving on.
Anger & Love
Sunday, November 09, 2008
Only human beings can judge and reason; we understand consequences and think in the long term. It is also true that human beings can develop infinite love, whereas to the best of our knowledge animals can have only limited forms of affection and love. However, when humans become angry, all of this potential is lost. No enemy armed with mere weapons can undo these qualities, but anger can. It is the destroyer.
– Dalai Lama
Nobody sees it but me )
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