My Whole Expanse I Cannot See…

I formulate infinity stored deep inside of me…
Archive for July 26th, 2011

Open mic last night

July 26th, 2011 | Category: Life

So, went to open mic at Sacred Grounds last night. It was okay for a little bit, but… I was, I was sitting there, Dani was on stage playing her violin. I’d already done my reading, Connection to divinity, Well, goodbye, and a really old piece, Your daily suicides. The first two were really hard to hear, that’s when I got that empty feeling in my chest, an emptiness that hurts, like a part of me is somewhere else.

Practically everything I’ve written for almost four years was for one person, I just wanted her to know how I feel about her, that I love her so completely, that I feel alone without her, that I have always been so scared of losing her. I gave her so many words, and, now I can’t stand reading any of them. I was in this room full of people and it all just felt so hollow, and lonely. So, I left.

Visual metaphor time!

Lauren, Dani, and me...

You can see my scruffy face, I think I’m just letting it go.

Me, but people are back there somewhere...

I tend to feel like this a lot, like only a part of me is anywhere.

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